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LisaMS1983
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Name: Lisa
Country: United States
State: Indiana
Birthday: 1/7/1983
Gender: Female
Interests: Music, talking on the phone with crazies, ritual (as opposed to random?) sacrifices, hanging out with friends, cleaning, being outside, movies, doodling, cannibalism (jk), typing badly... Oh wait, I don't have time for these, :'(
Expertise: Going to be headed back to school this summer. Massage Therapy here I come! And yes, mom, I am going to be a call girl lol.
Occupation: Administrative
Industry: Business
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  Lisams1983
AIM:  LisaMarieS1983
Yahoo:  MSNistheBestMessenger
Yahoo:  PrincessNotGunnaLaya
Member Since:
2/24/2003
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| So we’re back home. Whew!!! I can’t believe how much we have done and how much there is still to do. Crazy. The wedding went well. I still am sticking with my vote that everyone should elope lol. The people that would have complained might not even show up to your wedding anyway. I think through all of this I am still kind of appalled by some people’s total lack of common courtesy. There was one couple that said they were coming and didn’t show up because they had company in town, of all things. I mean, I send a save the date card out several months ago. I didn’t get it. I was honestly worried because until then they seemed like reliable people. Then the next day we were out and were going to go to a movie or go-carting or something but Jo called and said they were going to stop by at 4:30. We got there right at 4:30 (even hurried to get there on time) and waited around. 6:30 rolls around and I said, Fuck em. Let’s go. I understand you have company in town but holy crap CALL US AND LET US KNOW YOU ARE NOT COMING. Stop wasting our freaking time. After all those people got pissed off and the fighting that the number was only 50, only about 30 actually showed up. All that stress about having enough chairs was a complete waste of time. Making the name place cards was a waste (because there were two whole families that invited themselves and my point of view was they weren’t displacing my legitimate guests.) A few were sick, and man that sucks. I was sad that they couldn’t be there, and they were too, I know. I think what really made me sad was that we dropped $300+ on two pontoons that were basically empty. Brian called me at 3:40 (they were supposed to have left at 3:30; people were supposed to have boarded at 3:00) and said that they were missing people and I told them if they were that late, they can fuck off. You can’t show up 40 minutes late and expect the boats to still be there. Luckily it was that people hadn’t shown up at all. Had I known only 12 people needed to be there, I would have saved a lot of money.
Most of his family didn’t even send RSVPs. They had a card and an already-addressed and stamped envelope, how fucking hard is it to send it back?!? I can understand some people not sending them—obviously the groomsmen and bridesmaids are coming lol. It was so strange to me the overwhelming disconnect between retarded etiquette rules and complete lack of common courtesy. I mean, I think it needs to be pointed out the etiquette has gone crazy. On the one hand I have a 300 page book specific to wedding etiquette. On the other I have people offended anyway for various reasons (including that they are not already aware of the etiquette rules). Some rules are good (offering food to guests first). Some are freaking stupid (how to hold your silverware; having 20 pieces of silverware at each plate; rules on whether or not to eat French fries with a fork or not; how to put things in the envelope of a wedding invitation, as if having two pieces next to each other that don’t belong would cause the person opening it to explode). I believe these rules were created by some obnoxious extremely anal person and therefore, they can be ignored. Nobody is going to die if they eat their shrimp with a salad fork. That rule is stupid. Those kinds of rules are stupid. Getting rid of rules like that will not revert us to cavemen. Actually at work they sent out an email that we have to use arial, black, no bold or italics. What is this, nazi Germany? Give me a fucking break.
How many of you out there have been offended at least once because you were not invited to the wedding, the shower, the bach. party etc.? Here’s a heads up. It’s not about you. Weddings are expensive if you want it to look nice and don’t have heaping piles of free stuff from relatives. I don’t care how much you budget or how much you cut out—you either end up with a cheap-looking wedding or offended people. There’s always going to be that oversensitive person that thinks it’s tacky to do a certain something (either too much or too little). Not everyone has the $20 grand to burn on a one-day affair. One of my close friends had about a $10,000 budget and had a beautiful 100 person wedding. The decorations were partly free, partly borrowed/rented. The food was cooked by the groom with help. That was the only way they could HAVE a $10K beautiful wedding for that many people. If you are the kind of person that is comfortable having a $500 500 people wedding, good for you. I didn’t want that kind of wedding. I’ve never felt that comfortable with large crowds and I think that the kind of money it would take to have a pretty wedding for that many people is obscene. I thought I would be offending people by inviting them to a wedding four hours away. I have learned it doesn’t matter what you do, people will never be happy so you might as well be selfish. If you get angry because there isn’t an open bar, be aware that most caterers have ridiculous rules and they are expensive, $3000 minimum by themselves. We are lucky enough to have Josh’s mom’s restaurant to have our smaller reception at so we won’t have to deal with these retarded money-grubbing rules. However, there was a limited amount of space. There were literally 48 chairs. There is nowhere else to set up another table other than outside on the deck (only if the weather is nice) or the arena (designed for horse-back riding complete with horse poop smell).
Both of our families are large so immediate family, best friends and a few very very close others were invited. That was the only way we could keep it at 50. If you’re offended at that, sorry. One person actually cussed at me for not being invited to the wedding. Had I had a little more balls on me I would have told her to fuck off, it’s not about her. The girls also had to listen to a lot of bitching from all directions—I really wish on one day I didn’t have to listen to constant bitching, but I guess that is life. We had one girl that all she did from the time she got there Friday was complain that it was a dry county and she couldn’t get her drink on. Shut up. I wouldn’t say the bitching ruined my day by any means, but it didn’t help it any. I was stressed enough. I really wanted to just tell them to leave, but then I would have gotten yelled at more, even though it was what needed to be said. Josh was getting really tired of it too.
In the end, the reception went really well too. Jo really made it look beautiful in there. She had the tablecloths ironed and used the extra bridesmaid’s dress satin (i.e. what was leftover after hemming) to cover the candles so they matched our colors. I didn’t trip and fall in the lake off of the cliff (however in the heat that would have felt nice). I didn’t tear my dress on the shrubbery lol. It was good. So far we are living happily ever after haha. If you ever need to stay in Glasgow Kentucky, I recommend the Narrow Way Inn bridal suite. That bed was like sleeping on a cloud. I miss it already. Tomorrow we have to take Fuzz to the airport to fly back to stinky Connecticut. We are also picking up a foster animal or two from the Hamilton County Humane Society. Josh finally is getting the license situation taken care of. I can’t believe how hard they make paying off a ticket in Connecticut. Ridiculous. Mail this, mail that, call this person, they’ll mail you this, mail it back with money… In the end the prosecutor said he was nullifying the charges, which is nice. We just have to send in the money to reinstate his license and then get it switched to an Indiana license.
I wish I could email the etiquette part to everyone on the planet lmao.
If you made it to the end of this blog I am very proud of you LOL. Love you all!
Lisa Stapert.
PS
Also, I am sorry if I offended anyone with this note, but kind of not really. I learned a lot from this experience, and part of that was just about people. I think if you are engaged and you don’t like dealing with people, you should really consider eloping. Believe me having a smaller ceremony will not help you. Some people are really there because they genuinely want to be there and really want to help. Some are just there for the food. Some are just there because they have to be for one reason or another. You really learn who you can depend on and who you can’t. You learn who are really there for the right reasons. Also, I personally learned how ashamed I should be about past actions (I haven’t always remembered to RSVP by the due date). If someone reads this and recognizes him or herself, they too should be ashamed. Regardless of Miss Manners, it shouldn’t be wrong to let someone know that they are being rude. How else are they to know? There was so much on my wedding day that could have, SHOULD have gone much smoother and there was nothing I could have done to prevent it. Believe me, I tried my hardest to make it a smooth, relaxing day. In reality, it was not. The guys started out late because someone ran an errand with their tuxes in the car. I made a timeline that hardly anybody read or followed. I made a boat list that was left behind. I left instructions that were ignored. I made out maps and directions that had to be repeated for almost every person there. I had to call almost my whole guest list to find out who was coming because as far as mailed RSVPs only about 10 people were coming. Even then, people didn’t show up at the last minute for what I think are weird reasons. I mean if it were me, I wouldn’t have company planned on a day when I was supposed to be somewhere else. If there were special circumstances (i.e. someone home from Iraq or someone I never get to see in town), I would call the hostess to let them know I would not be there and why. Maybe you see it as inappropriate to say all this to everyone, but I think how some people acted from the time we got engaged to now was completely inappropriate and some people need a wake up call. Bitching because you weren’t invited or you don’t agree with who was invited is insane. They need to wake up to how much money it costs and that it isn’t about them. Bitching about the weather, the flowers, the dresses, the tuxes (the color, the style and the fact that they had to wear them), the place, that it was outside, that it wasn’t Indianapolis, the theme, the time, the day, the style (both too high and too low class), the cost, the save the date cards, other people, things not going according to plan, things being too planned, the fact that we cleared a path, the fact that it wasn’t cleared enough, that we even asked for an RSVP, the colors, the fact that we expected people in the wedding party to dress more formally than jeans, the water, the cliff, the boats, helping, the license was a Kentucky marriage license (even though every piece of information I found online said that it was illegal to do otherwise), the camera not working, the music not loud enough, the music choices, that it was a dry county, other people complaining, not having announcements, is NOT APPRECIATED OR APPROPRIATE. And yes, all of these were complaints I heard multiple times from multiple people, even after I told them their comments and criticism were neither requested nor appreciated. The immature person in me just wants to wait for their next parade to piss on, but we all know that won’t gain anything, and it IS inappropriate. I just wish some people had thought past the end of their nose. The weddings where I was closer to the bride or groom I thought went well. The people in general were nice and I don’t remember any of them arguing, “When you throw the perfect wedding you can bitch all you want.” “I don’t have to throw the perfect wedding to bitch all I want.” I probably wasn’t close enough to any of them to have heard all of the nit-picking of their choices (I’m sure that is a complete certainty for all weddings), but I know I didn’t witness any actual yelling on their wedding day that I remember. Not to be cheesy, but it is supposed to be one of the best, most meaningful days of the bride and groom’s lives. There were parts of my wedding day that no one should have to deal with. Granted there are other weddings I am sure that went far worse, but still. People can make or break it. I’m guessing when I give birth (the assumed next most meaningful day of Josh and my lives) these same people will be complaining (it was in a hospital, that it was natural, that it wasn’t natural, that it was a boy and they wanted a girl, that it was a girl and they wanted a boy, that it was both and they didn’t want either, that it wasn’t twins, that it wasn’t perfectly healthy, that the doctor was an idiot, that he talked above their head, that the waiting room chairs weren’t comfortable, that the labor took too long, that it was in the middle of the night and they were asleep, that it was in the middle of the day and they had to leave work… just giving the bitchers ideas ahead of time lmao).
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| So I haven't written in here since New Year's when I got food poisoning haha. I'm now actually on my second lame day home from work bc of strep (and an ear infection I think). Since this was my Spring break from school I'm really pissed. That's my time to catch up at work. I hadn't even brought anything home to work on. I'm so screwed. I went to bed last night at 5 and woke up at 8 thinking it was 8 in the morning. So I get up and take my pills and make some toast. As I'm doing this, I notice that April is making spaghetti. So I tease her about making dinner food at 8 in the morning and she looks at me funny and says, "What do you mean, morning?" I had only slept three hours but it felt like all night. Duh lol. So I told her to feel free to make fun of me for eating breakfast food at 8 at night. Anyway... April got engaged woohoo! I'm one of her bridesmaids. She went with her friend Tai to buy the dress last night (we tried on dresses a few weeks ago). It was good to see Tai. Seeing a guy but still not sure. We reported AM to the Better Business Bureau. I couldn't believe we were the first to do that. I mean they really suck so I just have a hard time believing no one else has done anything about it.
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| So I think I'm falling for Tyler...
Anyway, Merry Christmas everyone!
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| So AM Realty, our rental management company, sent us a survey. Actually, it was sent only to April. They also only ever CALL April when they need something. (If Shane or I called it would take three days and they'd still call April back, not us.) I mean survey? April wrote a full page of venting and I wrote a full page. My last line was that I had spent the last six months telling everyone and anyone with EARS to avoid AM unless they were choosing between AM and a cardboard box on the freeway (living in a VAN down by the RIVER!). So stupid. I also told them being shorthanded wasn't a valid excuse--they need to get organized and get their shit together. Anyway, I won't bore you with all the details for why this place sucks, and seeing as I had promised myself I'd go to bed at 9... lol.
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| Okay a quick post before I trail off to bed. Dave buggered off. I'm not even sure if I mentioned him, but if not he was a short-lived eHarmony guy. Things are back to normal with the family. I responded, they responded and it is all worked out. Although I still haven't had time to respond to them. Probably won't. It would be a terrible way to usher in the holidays lol. I met a different guy Tyler (from the same place) and he’s really nice. I like him a lot. From what I can tell, he likes me too, but we’ll see where it leads lol. I think I’m gonna run him through the rigorous Katie test this weekend haha. I need to get my hair cut and I want to see Tyler again before I head to Texas for a week anyway. I mean what if I get lynched down there for being too liberal?? I’d like her to meet him anyway. He makes me laugh. Plus we went out Saturday and I had a really good time so I invited him in for a movie when we got back—he was totally respectful. It was nice to not worry about having my leg humped as soon as I looked the other way lol. Anyway, not much else going on really. I really like my classes (Intro to Massage and Medical Terminology). There’s a crazy guy (that looks like a child molester and laughs like Krusty the Clown) that passed out business cards for his “massage parlor” (NO ONE uses that name—it’s a euphemism for prostitution ring) that said “relaxing passion is something we all need so let me be the one to take you to paradise and take away your stress” and his email was poobear something or other. Not PooHbear like Winnie the, poo like doodie. AND he put on there that he was a CMT when he’s not certified or DUH he wouldn’t be in school right now. Highly illegal I would think, since it's false advertisement. Actually my second class’ teacher said that we should bring it to a massage teacher’s attention. That kinda crap isn’t acceptable. Mary (friend from Strategies) made business cards and they were totally professional.
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